THE PHEASANTS ON THE JOHN BOWNE LAND LAB

[FAITH MOXEY]

They stood on the upper bars of the aviary, decked out in splendor with their brightly-colored feathers. These were the males. On the floor below were the inconspicuous females, with their newly-hatched chicks. These were the pheasants of the John Bowne High School Land Lab.
As I entered the gates of the farm, I was attracted to the bright flecks of color from the aviary to my right. I moved closer to get a first-hand view of these beautiful birds. The highly ornate males perched together on top as they strutted around; their pensive eyes giving me the impression that they were in their own private world. They paid no attention to the females and the five baby chicks below. The females cooed softly, while the males squawked and whistled in shrill tones. I wondered what they were thinking or saying. I felt a surge of sympathy towards the females and their young who seemed rejected by the proud males. The mothers and the tiny chicks shared similar brown and black feathers. They were standing beside a feeder with grain and water. Two tiny unhatched eggs lay on the ground beside them.
I found out later that this is typical of pheasants. The males play no part in rearing the young. I had only seen these colorful birds in photographs, so I was now delighted to see them in real life. The head feathers were bright yellow and were topped with even brighter orange-red crowns. The breast feathers were orange, while the lower body was covered with striped feathers - flecks of teal, blue, yellow, and red. The long tail feathers were similar in color.
Such magnificent feathers, I thought. I could just imagine the hats of ladies from another era being adorned by them.

[Alison Koffler-Wise]

Such beautiful writing, Faith. I love your clear and lovely description of the birds, their colors and sounds. You use some powerful verbs and adjectives--"pensive," "ornate," "whistled," "surge" (whoops, my bad, I think that "surge" is a noun--but I still like it! The pheasants are so alive in this piece, the combination of the descriptive language and your wonderings about them makes this a lovely piece. It makes me wonder how you could develop it further, should you want to...